‘They have asked me to come in to work — could you please look after my daughter? Yours will have more fun that way,’ your friend asks. And you had been counting on finally getting some rest that day. But you do not want to let your friend down either — she helps you out sometimes too.
The question of fathers and sons has of course been a live one in every age. And today any parent asks themselves a great many questions about upbringing, understanding and their relationship with their children. And on those poor parents rains down an unimaginable quantity of advice, answers, instruction and recommendations from teachers, counsellors, doctors…..
Everyone needs a place where they feel safe, secure and welcome. Everyone longs for a place where they can relax and be themselves. Ideally that place is the parental home you grew up in. Where you felt accepted and loved by your parents. From childhood we take in this feeling of being accepted and welcome as a fundamentally positive attitude to life, one that stays with us as adults as well. We have confidence in ourselves and we are able to trust other people. This is also called basic trust.
This is not just an article, it is a true story. At the end I offer a couple of hypotheses, a few guesses. I would very much like to hear from you, dear readers, what you think — and perhaps someone knows similar stories. Share your thoughts and observations; perhaps you know grown-up ‘abandoned babies’ — what do you notice in their character?
Grabmayrgasse 2, 1210 Vienna, Austria
