How should you think about the world in order to become miserable without any outside help? There is a list of beliefs for that, and each of them breeds a mental disorder of its own. These are irrational beliefs phrased as "musts". If you hear the word MUST in yourself or in others, combined with EVERYONE, EVERYWHERE or ALWAYS, there is something to think about.
These beliefs were worked out by Albert Ellis (1913-2007), an American psychologist and cognitive therapist, within rational emotive behavior therapy. According to Ellis, negative emotions arise from the way a person interprets their experience, as a result of irrational beliefs. In the ABC model Ellis developed, emotion "C" is an appraisal of external event "A". It is inner belief "B" that decides what that appraisal or emotion will be - positive or negative.
Here, then, is a list of beliefs ("B") that are guaranteed to make the emotion ("C") negative. With everything that follows from it...
It is absolutely essential for an adult that every step they take should appeal to those around them and win their approval.
It is vital for me to be loved, respected and approved of by almost everyone, especially by the people who matter to me and the people I depend on
There are actions that are vile, wicked, foul and bad, and those guilty of them should be punished harshly and without mercy.
The world must be fair, good must always win, evil must be punished, and people must act honestly and peaceably.
It is a catastrophe when everything is complicated and difficult and does not go the way it was planned, expected and wished for
The world should be simpler, problems have correct solutions, and it is terrible and appalling when things do not go the way I want and need
All our troubles are imposed on us from outside - by people or by circumstances - and we have little chance of controlling or managing them.
I am not clever/strong/adaptable enough to make things the way I want them, so all I can do is adjust and put up with it.
Life is dangerous; if something matters, troubles me, frightens me or worries me, I will stay on guard all the time
Anything dangerous or repellent upsets me deeply and for a long time, and I must constantly be doing something to keep it from happening.
It is easier to avoid decisions, responsibility and the difficulties and problems they bring than to work through them.
It is simpler to avoid facing difficulties and responsibility and to put off these challenges of life than to meet them head-on
Everyone needs something or someone stronger and more significant than what they feel inside and than who they are
I need a protector, someone stronger I can lean on; I cannot survive and run my own life on my own.
We have no power over our misfortunes, our inner experiences and our emotions, and we cannot manage them
There is little I can do about my anxiety/anger/depression, because it is caused by things that happen to me outside my awareness.
You have to know everything, be able to do everything, be versed in everything, understand everything, get everything done and do well at it, succeed in everything.
I must be 100% competent and adequate in every important area and gain every honour there is, or I am worth nothing
Whatever once had a strong effect on our life and changed it profoundly will always shape its course and determine what we do in the future
The causes of my feelings/behaviour/problems lie in my past; once I have found and worked through the important events, I will stop being upset
Our well-being is strongly affected by what other people do, so we have to get those people to change in the direction we want
I usually worry/get angry/feel low because of the problems of the people I care about; I am bound to influence and manipulate them, for their good and my own
Going with the flow, doing nothing, getting involved in nothing and wanting nothing - that is the true path to happiness and peace of mind
By getting involved in nothing and influencing nothing, by killing off my desires and feelings, I will become calm and invulnerable, and that will give me an advantage
Knowing these beliefs is especially useful for keeping your emotions in check and changing them. We have said that an emotion is an inner appraisal of outer circumstances made through beliefs (external event - belief - appraisal - emotion). So to change your emotions you can:
- keep an emotion diary, note your mood and rate it on a scale
- note the external situations that trigger these emotions
- with help from outside, find the beliefs that appraise the external situation.
- replace the belief you have found with an alternative one that produces at least a neutral appraisal. The beliefs on the list are the basic ones; other beliefs can be built out of them.
For example, I may find it irritating (a negative appraisal) when other people do not keep their agreements (an external event). The belief that may underlie the appraisal is: "It is a catastrophe when everything is complicated and difficult and does not go the way it was planned, expected and wished for. The world should be simpler, problems have correct solutions, and it is terrible and appalling when things do not go the way I want and need."
And of course, anyone who already knows the 12 personality types will easily guess which belief goes with which personality type.
