There is a magnificent scene in the film "Whiplash" (2014) that shows Sleight of Mouth at work in everyday "hard-nosed negotiation". What is interesting is that in some families digs are not the exception but the ordinary way of talking to one another.
We all need to communicate. But sometimes it is so hard to build a positive, constructive dialogue. Most of us have never been taught this on purpose, so here I shall try to give a little information about what is needed for you to come away from a conversation feeling that you managed to get across what mattered to you, and that you were heard and understood correctly. A little hard going, then, but important!
How do you «defuse» conflicts on social media? Here we will look at the situation where several vocal members of a group demand that the admins settle their quarrel. If you are a party to the conflict, what can you do? If you are the group admin, we will look at what is pointless to do, how to deal with members as a last resort, and we will touch a little on hating and trolling.
You are asked to speak. To make a speech. To give a toast. Spontaneously. No problem: a little work with Sleight of Mouth, and you have a universal template for the job! Sleight of Mouth - also known as reframings, also known as the Sleight of Mouth Patterns, also known as the "talking your way out of an attack" templates - was catalogued and immortalised by Robert Dilts in the book "Sleight of Mouth. The Magic of Conversational Belief Change".
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