What the schizoid type should strengthen
This is not a list of flaws — the strengths of the type are already there. What follows is what it usually lacks, and what can be built up with practice.
In short: holding back the force of ideas · being on an equal footing with people · accepting that life does not go to plan · accepting the freedom of others · softening idealism · lasting closeness · your own qualities can be described
Holding back the force of ideas. A rich inner world gives rise to ideas that are hard to carry out. The task is to match ambitions to reality and to accept that not every idea will be taken up or realised by others.
Being on an equal footing with people. Accepting that on your own territory — in the family, at work — there live living people with wishes of their own. This softens the isolation and makes possible bonds built on mutual understanding.
Accepting that life does not go to plan. Debunking the “delusion of grandeur”: the world is under no obligation to match anyone's ideas. Accepting this frees you from chronic disappointment.
Accepting the freedom of others. Everyone is free in their own choices. Out of this grows empathy, and away goes the expectation that those around you will act to someone else's plan.
Softening idealism. Allowing that a design may be realised with departures from the ideal scheme. Flexibility brings back the joy of the process as well as of the result, and not only of matching the ideal.
Lasting closeness. Opening up, sharing thoughts and feelings, accepting the closeness of another. Deep, trusting relationships are a direct antidote to the tendency towards isolation and a path to emotional maturity.
Accepting that your own qualities can be described. Uniqueness does not make a person indescribable. This is a step towards self-acceptance: seeing yourself more objectively, you discover that your particular features are not an obstacle but a strength.
